


SPSYF Side Stories

by iFanClover



Category: South Park
Genre: Kinda-Crossover, will add more tags as the story progresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-02-23 18:51:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 5,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13196376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iFanClover/pseuds/iFanClover
Summary: “Cartman, what are you doing this time?” Kyle asks.“I’m not the one doing it,” Cartman says, “Stan is!”“Why?”“Because I want a place where all our bullshit nonsense to exist so it doesn’t interfere with the main story,” Stan answers.“In this case, it means that it’s canon in this universe but will never be brought up again?” Kenny asks from behind Kyle.“Yep!” Stan beams.Kyle pinches the bridge of his nose. “Why are you adding on to Cartman’s stupid idea?”“He said that I’m the Honoka of this thing, which makes me the leader.” Stan puts on an orange wig. “So, I made the decision to make this book! Faito dayo!!”. . .“Okay, um, I didn’t mean for Stan to become a weeb; it just happened out of nowhere.”“Cartman, I am not a weeb! Craig is!!”“SHUT THE FUCK UP STAN!!!”





	1. Nico Nico Fuck You Cartman

**Author's Note:**

> Hi and this is where I put stuff I did for this thing but I didn’t want to interfere with the main storyline.
> 
> In Side Stories, all the boys are school idols except for New Kid because New Kid doesn’t go that far.
> 
> Plus, the stories can vary from very short to about 1000+ words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I hope you liked this nonsense bullshit adventure :3

“Hey, Kahl.”

Kyle turns around. “What is it, Fatass?”

Cartman chuckles. “Nico Nico Nii!”

“. . . Thanks I hate it.”

“FUCK YOU TOO KAHL!!!”


	2. Creek no Hanazono

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is in the format of a text group.

Craig: So I found out that there’s a song that New Kid likes called Garasu no Hanazono.

Tweek: What does that have to do with us?

Craig: It’s a song about two girls and some impure love between them.

Craig: Or something like that.

Tweek: Craig.

Tweek: What are you implying?

Craig: We’re singing this song at Kareoke Night.

Tweek: But Kareoke Night is tonight!

Craig: Exactly.

Tweek: EVERYONE IN OUR GROUP WILL BE WATCHING US SING!!!

Craig: That’s the point.

Tweek: CRAIG!!!

Craig: ヾ(๑╹◡╹)ﾉ"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gay


	3. South Halation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stan wrote parody lyrics of Snow halation for the holidays and this is how he decided to present them.

Waking up and hearing the birds sing a song  
I couldn’t help myself but go to sing along  
Walking down the street to the bus stop I always  
Stand where waiting with my closest friends

The days go by  
Chaos every day and night  
I close my eyes and start to  
Think about this melody

It won’t go away, so here it stays  
I say

Oh, how I love my quiet mountain town!  
I’ll show it now  
Through this feeling named  
“South halation”

Oh look, my friend Kenny’s not dead this time  
Craig and Tweek are gay  
What else can I say  
About this damn place?!

I’m the main character  
Yet I don’t do any shit anymore  
Cartman and Kyle are at it once again  
This doesn’t make sense. . .

Every day is the same in a normal life  
That’s why I’m happy to live where excitement’s at  
Even if what’s happening makes no sense at all  
I’ll still cherish each day til I die

Actually, wait  
I have some more stuff to say  
Butters is here once again  
Clyde and Token are good friends

At least I think so; wait, why do I care?  
Fuck this!!

Why do I suck at writing songs like these?  
Fun Fact: this thing  
Was originally  
A simple love song

Maybe I should just stick to comedy  
But then again  
Jimmy’d be there with me  
I’ll guess I’ll just pass

Maybe I’ll ask Wendy  
I just remembered we already broke up  
Now I’m going to cry myself to sleep  
I hate this imperfect life!!

I guess there won’t always be happy times  
Cause in the end  
Life is a huge bitch  
“South halation”

I had to place that phrase somewhere in here  
I really suck  
At writing songs like these  
Don’t you agree?

At least I have my friends  
And this loving community of folks  
I guess this mountain town isn’t so bad  
I’m ready to start!!

~~~~~

Kyle looks through the lyrics with a concerned face. Then, he looks at Stan. “Are you sure you’re okay, bud?”

“Yes,” Stan answers, wearing Honoka’s Snow Halation outfit. “Yes, I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> todokete


	4. Creek no Hanazono but it’s the Song They Sang at Kareoke Night and the Lyrics are Written by Your Gay Boy Craig Tucker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s another parody song.
> 
> Yes, I wrote the lyrics in one day.

La la la~  
(A maze of yaoi dreams)  
(A maze of just gay things)  
La la la~

I don’t really know why I’m singing this  
This song is honestly just dumb and stupid  
Then again, those words can also describe  
The person singing right now and that is me

Aah, this is too much pressure  
Inside this garden full of coffee beans  
Why did I agree to do this idol thing with you?  
It is because we are absolutely and totally gay!

Cuddling with guinea pigs at the petting zoo sounds like a perfect date  
If only we didn’t get followed walking there  
Because of stupid dickheads (stupid dickheads)  
Feasting off us (feasting off us)  
Being around each other and just staring  
While holding my lover’s hand

La la la~

I’m working everyday at my family’s  
Local coffee shop since the beginning  
I wouldn’t say that I’m very popular  
But that one costumer would disagree

Aah, it’s because I love you  
So much, I even brought our child over  
I don’t know if Stripe is allowed to drink coffee right now  
But at least we can get to see each other once again

This is probably the most gayest song that has existed to this day  
But we have to remember it’s a parody  
Of that one other song (other song)  
With two girls (with two girls)  
So we tried our best to change to  
Something that would fit us

Every night I cannot ever stop thinking about you in my dreams  
I love how your hand gently runs down through my hair

I want more!!

Even if people won’t leave us alone it will be okay cause I’m with you  
Your presence alone can brighten up my whole day  
You are the one that I (one that I)  
Love with all (love with all)  
Of my heart, can’t you feel it beating?  
It is beating for you

Even if there are people out there who will never approve of our love  
It’s not their business to stop this from happening  
It’s because our love will (our love will)  
Prevail all (prevail all)  
As we stand on top of the world in gayness  
Freedom and our gayness

La la la~  
(A maze of yaoi dreams)  
(A maze of just gay things)  
La la la~

~~~~~

Everyone reads through the lyrics that Craig wrote.

“This,” Cartman says, “I like this.”

“Oh yeah,” Kenny said, “I forgot that you kinda shipped them.”

Craig stands their proudly with Tweek right next to him. “How many people would be willing to buy this if we put it out for the public to listen?”

“Trust me, I’ll probably buy 10!” New Kid exclaims.

“50 copies!!” Cartman yells loudly.

Clyde shoots his hand up. “100!!”

“Well, Tweek,” Craig pulls his boyfriend closer, “we’re gonna become the richest gay couple in South Park!”

“T-Too much pressure!!” Tweek twitches.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yume no meiro  
> yaoi no meiro


	5. Butters is the Choreographer like Have You Seen Him Dance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kenny walks in on Butters and Kyle working out.
> 
> No, not that kind of working out.
> 
> No NSFW here even though I’m saying they’re teenagers in this story.

Kenny stares in shock at what he’s just witnessed.

Kyle Brovfloski.

Dancing.

In a way he never thought the redhead would move.

Butters stands a distance away, clapping to the beat. “One, two, three, four! One, two, three, four!” he repeats again and again.

Kyle ends his dance in one of the coolest poses Kenny has ever seen. _Where did he get all of that sex appeal?_ he thought.

Butters applauds in joy. “Great work there, Kyle!!” He gives him a water bottle. “Now you get some rest; I’m going to pack up your things for the day, alright?”

Kyle smiles with small beads of sweat dripping from his face. “Yeah. . .” he pants. “Thanks, Butters. . .”

“No problem!” Butters walks towards his and Kyle’s bags on the floor. “Loo loo loo I helped my friend out~” he sings to himself. Kyle walks towards the bathrooms connected to the room to change.

Kenny finds this the perfect opportunity to go talk to the blonde boy. He quietly walks into the room and towards Butters. When he gets there, he gets down onto his level and whispers into his ear, “Hey, Buttercup~”

“AAAAH!!!” Butters jumps. “O-Oh! H-Hey, Ken!!” He frantically waves. “Whatcha doin’?”

“Hm? Oh, nothing much.” Kenny pauses for a second before asking, “Hey, who taught Kyle to move like that?”

“Oh, it was me!” Butters exclaims. “I’m the choreographer after all!”

Kenny stares at Butters for about a minute, too surprised to say a thing. _This boy taught Kyle to dance like that?_

“Ken?” Butters waves his hand in front of Kenny’s face. “You okay there?”

“I-I’m fine!” Kenny claims, pushing his friend’s hand away. “I’m just astonished that you were the one who taught Kyle that.”

“Well, Cartman and Stan agreed that the song needed to have some, um, sex appeal to go along with it, so we decided to add it into the dance,” Butters explains. “I’m not the best at showing off that kind of stuff, but I did it to show Kyle what to do!”

“I see,” Kenny said. “But, I’m kinda upset, Buttercup. . .”

“Upset? Why?”

Kenny gets closer to Butters. “Because you showed Kyle that sexy side of you first and not me!” he complains.

Butters blushes from how close Kenny is and his response to a simple question. “K-Ken. . .” he mutters in embarrassment.

“What the hell are you two doing?” Kyle asks from behind them.

Kenny looks up at the redhead standing over them. “Oh, hello Mr. Lucky.”

“Huh?”

“How was Butters’ little dirty dancing?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Butters struggles under the hoodie-wearing boy. “Kenny, please get off me!!”

“Not until you agree to show me those dance moves yourself!” He smirks. “I want to see you move your body like that, too!”

“Kyle! Help!!” Butters whines.

Kyle sighs and pulls Kenny off of Butters. “There we go. Now, let’s finish what we were doing before _somebody_ got in the way.”

“Hey! It’s not my fault that I missed out on something so great!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, the song they’re talking about is Daring!! by Maki Nishikino.
> 
> Tsundere Song for Tsundere Boy


	6. The NicoRinPana You Never Asked For

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s another text story between three boys.
> 
> Our Nico
> 
> Our Rin
> 
> And Our Pana

Cartman: Now, we all know why I called you two to join this group chat.

Clyde: Actually, we don’t.

Tweek: Yeah. You just told us to join.

Cartman: Godamnit.

Cartman: Well, I’ll just tell you why you two are here.

Cartman: We all know that I am playing the best character.

Clyde: You’re not Eli tho.

Cartman: SHUT THE FUCK UP CLYDE!!!

Tweek: What is it that you want to tell us so badly?

Cartman: I am Nico.

Cartman: Clyde is Rin.

Cartman: And Tweek is Hanayo.

Cartman: Do you know where I’m going?

Clyde: I know from New Kid that NicoRinPana was a thing in the franchise.

Cartman: Exactly!

Cartman: And because we play their characters, we’re going to be this franchise’s NicoRinPana!

Tweek: GAH!! No way!

Cartman: Tweek, it’ll be fine.

Cartman: All we really do is sing two songs and produce a shit ton of Drama CDs and star in an episode of Emitsun Fight Club (and since Stan is our Honoka it’ll be called Stantastic Fight Club).

Clyde: That doesn’t sound hard.

Tweek: Oh. . .

Tweek: I guess it wouldn’t hurt to try it out.

Cartman: Fuck yeah! Cleekman is finally rolling!!

Tweek: Cleekman?

Cartman: CLyde twEEK cartMAN

Clyde: So, I guess we’re singing a rock song about food?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BRB Gotta Sing a Song About How Fucking Amazing Food is


	7. Protect? Protect

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New Kid and Butters have a small conversation that honestly goes nowhere.

“You know, you remind me a lot of someone I really wanna protect,” New Kid says.

Butters turns his way, a light pink smeared on his cheeks. “R-Really?”

“Yeah!” New Kid exclaims. “Sad thing is she’s a fictional character.” He laughs harder than he should have. “Good thing you’re real, huh?”

“. . . Y-Yeah. . .” Butters mutters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He’s kinda talking about Ruby.
> 
> Like, I know Tweek would probably make a good Ruby, but Butters is pretty Ruby-like, too!
> 
> Okay but
> 
> Kenny as Yoshiko and Mysterion is his version of Yohane.
> 
> That’d be fucking hilarious.
> 
> But then again, Butters can probably also do the Yoshiko thing with Professor Chaos as his Yohane.
> 
> There are so many options ;w;


	8. So Apparently the Jew is Magnetic Which is Unfair in Fat Boy’s Case

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so um
> 
> kyman?
> 
> hey sorry for being a multishipping bitch lady

“Cartman,” Stan says. “Why do you try so hard to get Kyle to notice you every time you two are in the same room?”

“The fucking Jew has some weird ass powers to attract people!” Cartman claims.

“But he only seems to attract you,” Stan says.

“Well then, his powers are unfair!” Cartman claims again.

“Well,” New Kid suddenly appears next to them, “would you call it a trap?”

“Yes!!” Cartman yells. “This Jew is fucking trapping me in his unfair magnetism today!!”

New Kid snorts. “It sounds like a song I know!”

“Oh God,” Stan groans.

“It reminds me of NicoMaki,” Kenny adds in, also appearing out of nowhere.

“Hey guys, what’s up?” Kyle says, walking towards them.

“FUCK YOUR UNFAIR MAGNETISM TRAP KAHL!!!” Cartman yells then runs away.

“. . . What?!” Kyle says, confused. “What does he mean?”

“It means you’re the Maki to his Nico,” Kenny answers.

“What?” Kyle says. “I don’t really understand.”

“Me neither.” Stan sighs.

“Wouldn’t Maki say what Kyle just said?” Kenny asks the New Kid.

“Yeah, except she’d go ‘Nani sore? Imiwakanai,’” New Kid replies.

“I don’t understand anything that just happened right now.” Stan grabs Kyle by the arm. “C’mon, let’s just go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s a trap :0
> 
> kyman is like nicomaki except cartman isn’t satan and kyle isn’t tsundere enough
> 
> b-baka cartman-kun
> 
> *cringes to death*


	9. New Kid Tries Out Some Shameless Advertising

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh dear

Butters looks over New Kid’s shoulder as he uploads the post. “Are you sure this will work?” he asks.

“Probably,” New Kid answers. “You can check the progress of it however you like by going to <https://spsyf.tumblr.com/> or whatever.”

“Okay,” Butters says. “I guess I will! I’m kinda scared about what might happen, but I’m also very excited!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mmmmmmmmmmmmmfuck


	10. Kenny: Ken and the Snow Bunnies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is like one of those School Idol Diary entries where we could get a day in the life of the characters.
> 
> I wanted to make something like that, so I did one with Kenny!

It was just a regular day in South Park. You know, the usual “snow is fucking everywhere” regular. I was just taking a nice walk to the park when I notice a certain blonde boy kneeling in the snow. Curious on what he was doing, I sneaked up on him.

“Buttercup~” I say.

“AAH!!!” Butters yelled, almost destroying something he’s holding. He turned around to see me standing behind him. “Oh, hiya Ken!”

“What are you doing there, Butters?” I asked.

“Well, it was originally gonna be a snowman,” Butters said, “but then New Kid showed me these snow bunnies he made just a while ago.” He placed the thing in his hands down on the ground. “He even taught me how to make them, see?” I leaned in to find three snow rabbits all next to each other. “That one’s my dad, that’s my mom, and the little one is me!”

I smiled at his somewhat pure innocence. “They’re very cute Buttercup,” I complimented. I noticed that he hadn’t talked about the one he just put down. “Hey, who’s that supposed to be?”

Butters looked to where I was pointing. “Oh, that one?” He picked it up. “It’s supposed to be you.” He brings it closer to me. “I didn’t really know how I would be able to show it to you on my own, but you got here before I could do anything, so here is you as a snow bunny!” Butters flashed that innocent and childlike smile I couldn’t help but love.

I gave Snow Bunny Kenny a little pat with my finger. “It’s really cute, Buttercup.”

“Thanks!” He looked back to his snow bunny family. “But, I dunno where to put it.”

I thought for a bit before asking something. “Hey, can I hold it?”

Butters looked my way, confused. But, he still obliged. “Sure, Ken.” He gently placed the snow bunny in my hand.

With my free hand, I carefully moved Butters’ snow bunny parents out of the way and placed Snow Bunny Kenny next to Snow Bunny Butters. “There we go!”

Butters gazed in awe at the two snow bunnies sitting next to each other. “Oh wow!!” He got closer to the ground. “They’re so cute together!!”

I got another idea. “Buttercup,” I said, “can you teach me how to make snow bunnies?”

Butters got back up and smiles. “Sure, Ken!” He scoops up a small pile of snow and gave it to me. “Why, though?”

“Because I thought it’d be cool to make all of our friends snow bunnies!”

Butters gasped in delight. “Then, we could make a Snow Bunny South Park!!”

I chuckled. “Yeah, sure. We can do that, too.

And so, the two of us spent the rest of our day making snow bunnies of everyone we knew and built our very own South Park our out of snow. Needless to say, this was much better than just taking a walk to the park!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to make snow bunnies, too!
> 
> Sadly, there’s no snow where I live ;w;


	11. [KINDA-SCRAPPED IDEA] I’m Sorry for Being a Closet Love Live Fan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had an idea where Craig was secretly obsessed with Love Live before starting this not-a-franchise franchise but then scrapped it.
> 
> I still kinda liked the idea so I’m putting a little snippet of it here.

Tweek and Craig are on Craig’s bed as they look through a book about Red Racer. After a while, Craig suggests they do something else, despite being the biggest Red Racer fan in all of South Park.

Tweek agrees and gets off the bed and walks towards the closet. Craig then shouts “Wait, Tweek! NO–“

But it was too late.

Tweek opens the closet to find a fucking shrine dedicated to some anime girl. He slowly cocks his head towards Craig and mutters loud enough for him to hear, “What the hell is this?”

Craig, embarrassed that his boyfriend has found his guilty pleasure, just says, “It’s a shrine dedicated to Hanayo. . .”

“Why?” Tweek asks.

“Becauseshe’smyfavoriteidolandshekindaremindmeofyouandherimagecolorisgreenandyouweargreenandthenIthoughtIfoundtheanimeversionofyouexceptyouwereagirlandlovedwhitericeinsteadofcoffee,” Craig takes a deep breath, “plusshehasthissrwhereshe’swithabunchofguineapigsandimentallyscreamedbecauseiwanteditsobadlybutnomatterhowhardiscoutedforhershewouldnevercomehome!!”

Tweek stands in place more confused than ever.

Craig then tugs his chullo down so it covers up his face. “I’m sorry for being a closet Love Live fan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Craig’s best girl would probably be Hanayo.
> 
> I mean, he likes Tweek, so he would probably like Hanayo, too.


	12. The Main Subunits

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since there are nine members in this thing, I have decided to post up the subunits because it’ll be a while before they’re put in the main story.
> 
> I haven’t given names for them yet, but I don’t mind taking suggestions :3

_Stan with Butters and Tweek - the Printemps of the group._

 Stan is pretty much the leader of the main group (because Cartman wanted to be Nico so he couldn’t be leader). He gets paired up with Butters and Tweek because they’re his KotoPana duo.

_Kyle with Cartman and Kenny - the lily white of the group._

Kyle is made the leader of this subunit, much to Cartman’s disagreements. Kenny didn’t seem to mind much, though. They had to change up the roles a bit for this group in order to fit them all. Kyle got put as Umi, Kenny as Rin, and Cartman as Nozomi.

_Token with Craig and Clyde - the BiBi of the group._

And here we got the coolest kids on the block: Token, Craig, and Clyde. Token was put in the leader position for this because Craig didn’t want the leader role and Clyde wanted to try out being Nico. And so, Mom Friend gets put in Cool Mom Friend Leader Person and they rev up the fog machines to blow them at the audience as their dramatic entrance to singing Cutie Panther because they’re cool. And Clyde raps in Trouble Busters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, have fun or whatever.


	13. If You Guys Were a Family, Who Would Have What Role? - Clyde’s Interview

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, just like that one HonoKotoMaki + Hanayo Thing.
> 
> You can find it somewhere on YouTube!

A family, huh? Well that’ll probably be an interesting experience! We’d all live in Token’s house for starters.

Out of all of us, Token would probably be the mom, because he’s already the mom friend. I guess that makes me Daddy by default! Haha!!

Craig would be our first son and Tweek is his fiancé. I think his parents would probably be Butters as the mom and. . . Father Kenny? Okay, that was a weird thought. Cartman and Kyle would probably be the twins in their family, since they fight so much.

Does that mean Stan would be our son? Or would he be our daughter? Anyways, Craig is his older brother!

That sounds like a nice family–well, _families_ –we have here, huh?

I can’t wait to open the door and shout, “Honey, I’m home!!” and shower my wife in kisses!

Shit, that sounded gay.

Um, please ignore that!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good family or bad family?


	14. Fan Stuff?

If you want to give me some fan stuff, feel free to do so!

I prefer getting them through Tumblr, but any other way you can think of is great, too!

It just depends on what I got :3

If you’d like to submit something through Tumblr (you need a Tumblr account for that), my main is [ifanclover.tumblr.com](http://ifanclover.tumblr.com) :3


	15. Something

Mega Fist Puncheru is Craig’s Love Arrow Shoot.

Okay bye.


	16. Token: ValenTyde’s Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!
> 
> My gift for you is this!!
> 
> It’s like the Kenny one but it’s Token :3

If you were to ask me what my favorite holiday is, you’d probably laugh at me. Token Black, the richest boy in South Park, loves Valentine’s Day the most. Yes, February 14th is my favorite holiday. The day where couples are able to spend time with each other, and no one would really bat an eye. I don’t really know why it is, I’ve always just had a strange connection to it.

But this Valentine’s Day is a different one. It’s the first Valentine’s Day after every single girl at South Park Elementary broke up with their boyfriend. And yes, it still hurts.

Tweek and Craig are still happy and healthy together, like always. And P.C. Principal and Strong Woman–or Butters’ school parents as what the fourth grade has called them lately–are also just as loveable.

And then there’s me, Token Black, who’s favorite holiday is Valentine’s Day. Or, was. After what happened, it’s kinda been harder for me to find love or fall in love or just anything related to love in general. Nichole and I aren’t together anymore, and that still hurts me.

But, I guess it hurt Stan a lot more. Despite him and Wendy breaking up and getting back together every once in a while, he still gets broken into bits whenever they split. Plus, he’s currently sulking in the boys bathroom today.

How do I know? Because I’m also in the boys bathroom, staring at a heart-shaped box of chocolates with a single magenta ribbon around it. Stan is sitting right next to me, sulking because last year was probably the very last time he could spend this day of love with Wendy.

“So,” he says, “who is that box for?” He looks my way, waiting for an answer. “I know it’s not for Nichole; none of the girls really want us back now. So, who is it for?”

I try to find a good answer for this, because what I’m gonna say will determine the outcome.

“Is it for your ‘husband’?” Stan suddenly asks. “You can tell me, you know. I’m your son.”

Oh, he’s playing the Fake Family card again. And I am fucking falling for it again.

“Yes, it is for your father, Stan,” I answer. “I wanted to give him something special for today.” Stan’s “father” and my “husband” is Clyde, if it isn’t obvious enough. We haven’t played this Fake Family thing since Christmas.

“That’s nice,” Stan mutters. “You’re lucky.”

I turn his way. “How?”

“You actually got someone to spend Valentine’s Day with.”

I grow a little red when he says that. “What are you talking about? I’m just gonna give it to him.”

“Suuuuure~” Stan says, smiling a little.

“Oh, please.” I roll my eyes. “I’m surprised that you’re not in here because you don’t have Wendy with you, but because you’re hiding from Kyle.”

His eyes widen and quickly jumps up. “That’s not true!!” he shouts.

“Suuuuure~” I say, imitating his tone.

The door to the bathroom opens and Kyle walks in. “Oh, Stan! There you are!!”

“Crap,” he mutters.

I give him a teasing smile, stand up, and leave the bathroom.

~~~~~

I guess all I can really do now is find Clyde.

But first, I need one more prop.

I open up my locker to find a light pink apron with the words “Mom Friend” sewn on. Thanks, Kenny.

I put the apron on and close the locker while picking up my gift for him. _Now_ , I can try to find him.

I walk through the hallways, looking for that flirtatious brunette. While doing so, I remember the day where he named himself the dad of the group, basically making me his “wife” because I’m the mom. I laugh at the thought and wonder why it hasn’t gotten out of hand yet.

After a few more steps, I find him talking to Tweek, Craig, and Jimmy. I smile and quickly walk up to them. It’s a good thing his back is facing me.

I tap Clyde on the shoulder to signal him that I’m here. He turns around with a questioning look on his face. “Token?”

”Happy Valentine’s Day, dear!” I hand him the heart-shaped box. “I got this just for you!”

Clyde stares at the box then back at me. “Seriously?” he says, trying to hide his obvious smile. “This is for me?”

Meanwhile, the canon couple are whispering to each other and Jimmy is there giggling away.

”Of course it is! Why would I not give my wonderful husband anything on this romantic day?” I place the box in his hands. “Please, just take it,” I say in a more serious tone. “I don’t want any more kids staring at me.”

Clyde takes the box from my hands and stares at it for a few seconds. He looks at me and smiles. “Thanks, Token.”

I blush a little after he said that. Tweek and Craig are now laughing along with Jimmy.

”You know, I also have a gift for you!” Clyde takes a step closer to me.

”Huh?” I say before it happens.

He cups my face in his hands and gives me one of those theatre kisses. It lasts for a few seconds before he pulls away.

Because the other three weren’t able to see where Clyde’s thumbs were, they all thought he actually kissed me which left them in silent shock.

”Happy ValenTyde’s Day, sweetheart~” He winks my way.

I feel my face grow hotter. Did he actually just do that?! Why did he–

“Dude, gross,” Craig said loudly.

”Holy shit!!” Tweek shouts.

”W-Wow, Clyde. Just, wow,” Jimmy says, chuckling.

I didn’t really know what else to do from there, so I just hid my face in Clyde’s chest. “You little bastard. . .” I mutter in embarrassment. I secretly smile as I say this.

I guess Valentine’s Day is still my favorite holiday after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it’s finally done!!
> 
> If you don’t know what a theatre kids is, it’s when you hold a person’s head with both hands and cover the front of their lips with your thumbs. That way, you don’t actually kiss them because there’s a barrier between you two.
> 
> I wonder where Clyde got that idea?
> 
> EDIT: It’s actually called a stage kiss but whatever :3


	17. Put it Down Except it's Not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a stupid thought

Tweek: *walks up to the piano, puts out sheet music, and starts to play*

Craig: Aishiteru Banzai!


	18. Craig: Precious White Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy White Day, everyone!
> 
> For those who don’t know what White Day is, it’s like a second Valentine’s Day that’s celebrated in Japan.
> 
> Expect Creek.

Well, today White Day. I don’t really know why this town is really celebrating this, but I don’t really care. Then again, this is probably Cartman’s doing while inspired by the New Kid’s conversations with the Asian girls. Poor guy.

“I can’t wait to surprise him!” Clyde exclaims happily. “Man, two Valentine’s Days? Yes please!!” He’s carrying a bright blue stuffed bear holding pink and purple hearts in his arms; probably a gift for Token since he gave him chocolates last month. God, I hate how they can be cuter than Tweek and me sometimes despite not even being a fucking couple. They even shared a kiss together before Tweek and I got to that level of intimacy!! Fuck you, Clyde and Token.

Clyde stares at me for a brief minute. I don’t know if he is trying to be sneaky or not, but he’s being really obvious. “Why don’t you have a gift for Tweek?” he asks me.

. . . Oooooooh _shit_. . .

“. . . I forgot to get one,” I reply bluntly.

Clyde jumps back in response. “Dude!!” he shouts. “Tweek is your boyfriend, and you forget to get him something for White Day?! Token and I aren’t even an actual couple, and I _actually_ attempted to buy him a gift because he’s my, well, ‘wife’!” Oh God, he’s going all _Fake Family Dad_ on me again. “Your ‘fiancé’ is someone really special to you, so you have to keep him happy! It’s like forgetting your anniversary date! Your ‘wife’ gets upset that you forget, and then you have to try to find a way for him to forgive for the rest of the day!”

“That happened to you before, didn’t it?” I ask him.

He pauses, looks down miserably, and mutters a low “Yes. . .” He then springs back up. “But, it really was my fault for forgetting such a wonderful moment that started our relationship!!”

“God, you sound like you and Token are already married,” I groan.

“Did you seriously forget that I proposed to him on the playground with a Ring Pop during Recess?”

“Oh.” I guess they _are_ married. . . I think.

We both notice Token talking to Tweek, Jimmy, Timmy, and Scott about something probably idol-related. Clyde excitedly runs over to Token and gives him the stuffed bear. It seems to have embarrassed Token quite a bit because he’s now hiding his face in it. I feel my brain gag as I watch these two act like lovestruck idiots. Why can’t Tweek and I be like this? Oh right. Because I’m too goddamn awkward to do something like that. When’s the age that teenage hormones kick in again?

“Um, Craig?”

I suddenly blank out of my blanking out space as I see Tweek right in front of me. He’s holding what looks to be a box wrapped in the custom-made coffee mug and guinea pig wrapping paper he got with a blue and green ribbon messily wrapped around it. That’s just like my Tweek Tweak.

“Craig!!” he shouts, taking me out of my second blank out.

“Huh? Oh, hi honey,” I say.

My boyfriend sighs with a smile on his face. “Seriously?”

“‘Seriously’ what?”

“You didn’t bring me a gift for White Day?”

“Clyde told you didn’t he?”

“Of fucking course I did!!” Clyde shouts from where his arms are holding Token close to him. “Sorry for shouting like that right next to you, darling.”

All we heard from Token is a muffled whine that sounded a lot like “Clyde. . .”

Ew. Gross. Get a room.

Tweek shakes his head and gives me the small box. “This is for you.”

I stare at the box, then back at him, then back at the box. I carefully unwrap it, making sure to not tear the paper. I take of the lid to reveal what’s inside it and a small gasp escapes from my lips.

“Holy shit. . .” It’s a charm bracelet that has charms of the things I like: Red Racer, my guinea pig Stripe, Tweek, and a rainbow heart. The fifth and final charm is of my initials in blue. “Tweek. . . Oh my fucking God. . .” I take the bracelet out of the box and put it on. “This is so fucking cool!!”

He takes my hand with the bracelet in his, which is when I notice that he’s got one, too. The charms on it are a coffee mug, his pet bird, a rainbow heart just like mine, and me as well as his initials in green.

I look up to meet his gaze and warm smile. “Happy White Day, Craig.”

I smile back. “Happy White Day. I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything, Tweek.”

“It’s fine!” Tweek replies. “I wasn’t expecting anything from you anyways.”

A few distant “Oooohh!!”s come from our friends who were watching the whole thing. Me, being the Craig Tucker, flip them all off. Then I turn back to Tweek. “Do you really think that low of me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have I ever mentioned that I love these two?


	19. Token vs. Craig: Best Girl Debate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is originally from the Love Live episode of the YouTube series "The Idols of Anime" by Viga Loves.

Token (Talking About the Love Live Movie): The last song gets to me emotionally. It makes me remember that time: just sharing the fun with other fans who are as passionate as me. And talking about the end together. And talking about our favorite members. Like, you know, Nico being the best!

Craig: WHAT did you just say?!

Token: Oh, I just said the truth: Nico is best waifu. Lots of evidence for it from her beautiful cute pigtails, her cute attitude, her catchphrase "Nico Nico Nii~!!"

Craig: Oh, please! Spare me! Everyone's heard that catchphrase ten thousand times already! It cannot compare to the. . . the beauteous ringing of another certain catchphrase. You may have heard it. *clears throat* "DAREKA TASUKETE!!!"

Token: HANAYO? You're a HANAYO supporter?

Craig: That's because Hanayo is mature enough to know when she needs help. I mean, what 18-year-old still wears pigtails and ribbons?

Token: She threw away her adorable meganeko-ness for contacts. CONTACTS!!!

Craig: You do not dare impune the reality of Hanayo's TOTALLY 100% NATURAL PURPLE EYES!!!

Token: Look look look. Look. First off: Nico, she has great style and taste. Two: her room is, like, so beautiful and cute and stylish. Three: her red eyes, she can shoot lasers! Four: Nico Nico Nii~!!

Craig: THAT WAS ONE TIME!!! THERE'S ONLY SO MANY THINGS TO DO IN NEW YORK!!!

Token: Look look. Nico is. . . is the 24th hokage of idol culture and she had lasers in her eyes, and kung-fu action grip, and. . . and hips that don't lie, and pigtails that can see through time!

Craig: You shut your mouth! Those are not contacts! And what did you say about red eyes being natural, especially with lasers did I hear? That sure sounds like a lot of reasons to like Nico, but I'll let you, that Nico is not an alpaca whisperer who understands the comfort of the style black leggings, who've also has a much cuter catchphrase and a much more organic one that is not so cynically crafted as Nico's totally artificial Nico Nico Nii. Well, if Nico is the queen, then Hanayo is the revolutionary, leading the interests of the common brunette into the future! Viva la Idol Revolution!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert Clyde recording the entire fight on his phone and posting it on the internet here*


	20. Token: Secret Birthday Gift

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s Token’s birthday today!
> 
> Happy birthday my sweet child out of. . . Umm. . . A ton.
> 
> Anyways, this is based off of a drawing I made of him :3
> 
> Here’s the link: http://ifanclover.tumblr.com/post/175085035541/so-i-remembered-that-its-tokens-birthday-today
> 
> I hope you enjoy this diary entry!

Well, it’s my birthday.

Happy Birthday to me, I guess.

. . . I don’t really know why birthdays are such a big deal anymore.

Maybe it’s because I’m getting older?

I dunno.

Well, at least I got my friends to hang out with; we were told last night to meet up in the Home Ec classroom for something. Everyone knows what the meeting is for.

Everyone except me, as expected.

They wanted to surprise me on my birthday like a good group of friends. I’m not being a dick, I swear. I really love that they are doing this just for me. I just wished I told them beforehand to not do it. . .

I stand in front of the door to the Home Ec classroom. Didn’t Kenny used to take classes here? I guess that’s where his sewing skills came from.

I open up the door to get a blizzard of confetti thrown into my face as eleven people shout “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!” in unison.

I think some of the confetti got into my mouth.

After cleaning myself up, I get pulled somewhere I’ve never really been to before.

“So, what do you think?” Kenny’s voice comes through.

I blink a couple of times, but couldn’t see a single thing. “Kenny,” I said, “your jacket is in the way of my si–“

He quickly pulls his orange parka out of my face to reveal his gift for me.

“So, what do you think?” Kenny repeats as he ties his parka around his waist. “I worked super hard on it.”

“Is. . .” I mutter. “Is this for me?”

“Yep!” He pulls me forward so I could get a better look at it. “What do you think?”

My hand lightly grazes the soft material as I stare in awe at the magnificent handwork. “It’s really cute,” I tell him.

“That’s great!”

“Unfortunately, I don’t think I can wear something like this.”

The light in Kenny’s face burns out. “What do you mean?”

“It’s cute and I do like it a lot, Kenny,” I explain, “but I don’t think I’d look that good in it.”

“What?!” Kenny pushes me into a free dressing room with the dress he made. “The only way to make that conclusion is to try it on yourself. Don’t worry, I’ll be the first to judge.”

I look at the dress, then at my reflection. Taking a deep breath, I slowly take it off the mannequin.

Well, better get this over with.

~~~~~

I nervously step out of the dressing room and into Kenny’s line of sight. He observes me in a strange way that I can’t comprehend and it makes me a bit uncomfortable.

“Now, what did I tell you?” he said. “This dress looks perfect on you!”

“You really think so?” I turn around to let him view the entire costume. “I’m a little embarrassed about this.”

“Don’t worry, Token.” Kenny takes my hand. “They’re gonna love you new birthday suit!”

“I don’t think that’s the correct term to use,” I tell him.

When we came out of wherever we were, the rest of our friends turn their heads toward us.

“Holy shit, Token,” Craig says. “You are seriously soooooooo lucky.”

“You really think I don’t look that bad in this?” I ask them.

In response, I’m given multiple “no”s and head shakes. Then Clyde walks towards me and takes my other hand. “And you thought we didn’t think you were cute!” He hands me a microphone. “How about a little birthday solo, my beautiful wife?”

I roll my eyes and take the mic from him. “How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?”


End file.
